We're Heeerrrree!

We finally made it to Ohio and have pretty much recovered from the trip. Our last day of work was on Friday 12/15. My mom arrived that day and Jim's mom came on Saturday. We spent 2 days packing and then hit the road on Monday.

We rented space in a trailer to haul our stuff across the country, we pack and they drive. It turned out to be about 1/2 the price of driving it with a UHaul and way easier. After we transferred our stuff from a UHaul to the trucking facility 40 miles south, we drove 10 hours to Flagstaff, AZ. On Tuesday we drove up to the Grand Canyon, about 2 hours north. The Canyon was fogged in, but we could still get the general idea of how amazing the place is. I hope to get back there one day.

We spent a 2nd night in Flagstaff, then drove for 3 days through NM, TX, OK, MO, IL, IN, then on to OH. It took until yesterday for all of us to feel rested again.

The cats were mildly sedated throughout the trip and slept pretty happily in a large cage on the back seat. They are a bit cautious in their new temporary home at Jim's parents, but warming up to the place. If only that darn Beagle would disappear, they would be a lot happier!

Ohio or Bust!

Well, we are finally doing it... Jim & I are moving back to Columbus. It's been wonderful in Santa Barbara, but we feel it's time to give the ice and cold a shot. Seriously, we both have a ton of family and friends there, plus the housing and job markets are 10 times better than here.

We plan to leave around December 17th. We know it's really fast, but we'd like wrap things up here before Christmas. Plus, the moms are able to come out to help us drive 2400 miles east with the cats.

We don't know where we will live yet, but there are so many inexpensive options that it seems really easy to figure out compared to SB. I'm taking a job as Development Director at the Ohio Environmental Council, based in Columbus. I'm really excited about the position and look forward to starting at the beginning of January.

I'll be vacationing in exotic Santa Barbara at the end of January for the SB Film Festival. I've been volunteering and get a free platinum pass. For those not local to SB, it's a $1500 value which gets you in to all of the films, panel discussions, and most importantly - the parties. Al Gore, Forrest Whitaker, and Will Smith will be in attendance, so it should be a good time. If you are local and plan to attend any film fest events, then let me know!

We're having a going away party next Saturay 12/10 from 2-6 at our house. It's also Jim's 33rd birthday. Please come wish us well as we go to the hinterlands. We're at 609 W. Carrillo St.

We'll be taking almost everything we own with us, but will have a few things to give away, including our plants. On the flip side, we've compiled a wish list of stuff to help us on our move. Feel free to bring any of this stuff over! Some of it could be borrowed and returned.

Boxes of all shapes and sizes

Music & books on CD to listen to on our 40 hour drive. Please burn stuff for us!

MP3 player (& speakers?)

CD player power adapter. may need a tape player to CD player adapter too.
Large crate or 2 cat carriers to hold cats in car
gas cards
2 Walkie talkies

digital camera (looking to buy an inexpensive and small camera)

CONTACT INFO IN COLUMBUS

I'm changing my email address to jodisegal at gmail.com. Jim's email is jalama at gmail.com. We will change our cell #s, but let you know. Currently I am 805-895-8165. Jim is 617-417-2541. If you need to mail me anything, use my parents address: 10161 S. Crosset, Pickerington, OH 43147

Cute Lefty "article"

Hot off the presses from the Manitoba Herald, Canada

The flood of American liberals sneaking across the border into Canada has intensified in the past week, sparking calls for increased patrols to stop the illegal immigration. The actions of President Bush are prompting the exodus among left-leaning citizens who fear they'll soon be required to hunt, pray, and agree with Bill O'Reilly.

Canadian border farmers say it's not uncommon to see dozens of sociology professors, animal-rights activists and Unitarians crossing their fields at night.

"I went out to milk the cows the other day, and there was a Hollywood producer huddled in the barn," said Manitoba farmer Red Greenfield, whose acreage borders North Dakota. The producer was cold, exhausted and hungry. "He asked me if I could spare a latte and some free-range chicken. When I said I didn't have any, he left. Didn't even get a chance to show him my screenplay, eh?"

In an effort to stop the illegal aliens, Greenfield erected higher fences, but the liberals scaled them. So he tried installing speakers that blare Rush Limbaugh across the fields. "Not real effective," he said.

"The liberals still got through, and Rush annoyed the cows so much they wouldn't give milk."

Officials are particularly concerned about smugglers who meet liberals near the Canadian border, pack them into Volvo station wagons, drive them across the border and leave them to fend for themselves.

"A lot of these people are not prepared for rugged conditions," an Ontario border patrolman said. "I found one carload without a drop of drinking water. "They did have a nice little Napa Valley cabernet, though."

When liberals are caught, they're sent back across the border, often wailing loudly that they fear retribution from conservatives. Rumors have been circulating about the Bush administration establishing re-education camps in which liberals will be forced to drink domestic beer and watch NASCAR races.

In recent days, liberals have turned to sometimes-ingenious ways of crossing the border. Some have taken to posing as senior citizens on bus trips to buy cheap Canadian prescription drugs. After catching a half-dozen young vegans disguised in powdered wigs, Canadian immigration authorities began stopping buses and quizzing the supposed senior-citizen passengers on Perry Como and Rosemary Clooney hits to prove they were alive in the '50s.

"If they can't identify the accordion player on The Lawrence Welk Show, we get suspicious about their age," an official said.

Canadian citizens have complained that the illegal immigrants are creating an organic-broccoli shortage and renting all the good Susan Sarandon movies. "I feel sorry for American liberals, but the Canadian economy just can't support them," an Ottawa resident said. "How many art-history majors does one country need?"

In an effort to ease tensions between the United States and Canada, Vice President Dick Cheney met with the Canadian ambassador and pledged that the administration would take steps to reassure liberals, a source close to Cheney said. We're going to have some Peter, Paul & Mary concerts. And we might put some endangered species on postage stamps. The President is determined to reach out," he said.

Movie honors

Last week the Film Festival reviewers had a potluck and training session. Everyone introduced themselves and described their background in film. By the time it got around to me, at the end, I realized that I was the only person in the room except for the program staffer's wife who didn't have credentials. Every other reviewer has a film degree or has worked in the industry. I'm really lucky to get to play with the big kids!

My favorite Adam pic

New Movies

I'm getting to see a ton of new movies before they are released through a film club, so check out my reviews before plonking down your $10. See the link on the right.

Front Page!

Click on the picture to zoom. I'll upload a couple more photos of the Walk once I have them.

AIDS Walk results

The preliminary # is in, we raised $125,000! It's less than I hoped, but still on budget. This is a total of the pledges written on pledge sheets and $ is still coming in. It will creep up a bit to probably at least hit 130k. We had twice as many walkers as last year, many of whom signed up at the last minute and didn't raise $. We can draw on those people to raise $ next year and to grow our mailing list.

Tomorrow is the big day

Tomorrow is the AIDS Walk! Last year we raised $130,000. Usually I'm really good about guessing income, so I want it on the record that this year my bet is on $165,000. We've had a huge response to our recruitment efforts (which includes a part time staffer and an intern) and tremenous press (front page on this Sunday's News Supress). It doesn't seem unreasonable that we would do 20% better.

Any other bets? Following is the story:

AIDS Walk a chance to show heart and sole
October 1, 2006

When Crystal Young was diagnosed with HIV 15 years ago, she moved into a hospice. Back in the early 1990s, the virus that causes AIDS was considered a death sentence.

"I was scared," said Ms. Young, 40, of Lompoc. "That's what you did back then."

She is no longer afraid. It takes longer to recover from colds and infections, but other than that, life is normal. She is raising a teenage daughter, working and living the life of a regular adult.

Ms. Young will share her story this weekend as one of hundreds of participants at the 16th annual Heart & Sole AIDS Walk sponsored by the Pacific Pride Foundation, Santa Barbara's largest care and education organization for those with AIDS and HIV.

This weekend's event is the primary fundraiser for Pacific Pride, which, like other programs around the state, has seen its funding from the government slashed each year. Public funding decreased about 5 percent this year, a significant cut in a $2 million total budget.

That has worried health workers, particularly because the number of new HIV cases has risen as the number of people being tested has declined significantly. That trend is true around the country and in Santa Barbara County, where 33 new cases of HIV were diagnosed in 2004, compared to seven in 1999.

At the same time, the number of people who were tested declined to 2,790 in 2004 from 4,060 in 1999, according to the Santa Barbara County Department of Public Health.

The intent of Saturday's walk is to raise both money and awareness, organizers say. This year is especially significant: It is the 25th anniversary of the first documented case of HIV/AIDS in the United States.

"I remember when we first start doing this back in the late 1980s to early 1990s, we were going to funerals almost every week," said David Selberg, executive director of Pacific Pride. "It's amazing how far we've come."

Ms. Young was diagnosed on Jan. 7, 1991. She contracted the disease from a man who was using intravenous drugs.

"I was shocked," she said. "At that time, it seemed like there were no women being diagnosed. I thought it was just for gay men and drug users. It was scary, very scary."

She planned her funeral and moved into Sarah House, a hospice that opened in Santa Barbara specifically for AIDS/HIV patients.

Because of improved medical treatment and better understanding of the disease, Sarah House now has to room to admit people who are dying of other ailments, such as cancer and Lou Gehrig's disease.

The decline in death rates is certainly good news. But at the same time, health officials fear that the public has become complacent.

Decreases in funding have meant cuts in outreach and education. Much of the money Pacific Pride receives through grants, contracts and private donations is earmarked for specific causes, such as HIV testing, case management and primary health care.

The goal of Saturday's walk is to at least match last year's total of $130,000, which largely goes toward paying overhead costs that don't receive public funding. The money will also be used for the organization's food pantry, services for gay and lesbian awareness, and outreach to schools, the mentally ill, the homeless and others.

"We need to fill in those holes," said Jodi Segal, director of development for Pacific Pride and co-organizer of the AIDS Walk. "Without our donors, our budget falls apart."

Pacific Pride's fundraising goal throughout the year is about $300,000, roughly half of which comes from the AIDS Walk.

Mr. Selberg said a particular need is reaching out to youth, who account for many of the new cases. The organization recently assigned two part-time workers to reach out to online chat groups and Internet sites, which have become common venues for soliciting sex.

In Santa Barbara County, about 1,500 people currently live with HIV/AIDS. With offices in Santa Barbara and Santa Maria, Pacific Pride serves about 600 clients in its programs.

Organizers expect about 500 walkers and 200 volunteers to participate in this year's AIDS Walk. The 10-kilometer event starts at Leadbetter Beach, takes walkers along the shoreline and ends back at Leadbetter, wrapping up with a gathering for speeches, food, music and free massages. Also, prizes will be awarded to the biggest fundraisers.

Registration opens at 8 a.m. {this is wrong, it's actually 9am} Saturday, and the walk begins at 10 a.m. For more information, visit www.pacificpridefoundation.org, or call 963-3636.

My view:

Things you have to believe to be a Republican today:

* Saddam was a good guy when Reagan armed him, a bad guy when Bush's daddy made war on him, a good guy when Cheney did business with him and a bad guy when Bush needed a "we can't find Bin Laden" diversion.

* Trade with Cuba is wrong because the country is communist, but trade with China and Vietnam is vital to a spirit of international harmony.

* A woman can't be trusted with decisions about her own body, but multi-national corporations can make decisions affecting all mankind without regulation.

* HMOs and insurance companies have the best interests of the public at heart.

* Global warming and tobacco's link to cancer are junk science, but creationism should be taught in schools.

* A president lying about an extramarital affair is an impeachable offense. A president lying to enlist support for a war in which thousands die is solid defense policy.

* Government should limit itself to the powers named in the Constitution, which include banning gay marriages and censoring the Internet.

* The public has a right to know about Hillary's cattle trades, but George Bush's cocaine conviction is none of our business.

* Being a drug addict is a moral failing and a crime, unless you're a conservative radio host.
Then it's an illness, and you need our prayers for your recovery.

* You support states' rights, which means Attorney General John Ashcroft can tell states what local voter initiatives they have the right to adopt.

* What Bill Clinton did in the 1960s is of vital national interest, but what Bush did in the '80s is irrelevant.


...Ahhh, government at its best.

I need a sponsor!

Please sponsor me for the 2006 AIDS Walk. The AIDS Walk is my most important event for the year, raising $150,000, which is half of my budget. All money raised pays for HIV education and services provided by Pacific Pride Foundation (my employer!) in Santa Barbara County. If I raise $500 then I get a cool canvass tote bag!

You can sponsor my sending me a check or donating online.

Pacific Pride Foundation
126 E. Haley St., Suite A-11
Santa Barbara, CA 93101

Thank you to everyone who sponsored me last year, and to mom and dad for donating $75 this year! Only $425 left to go until I get the tote bag!

End of an Era

I'm very sad to report that I sold my Vespa today. Even though I love it, I barely ever ride and never have felt comfortable on it. Here's a photo that was taken before I bought it by the owner of the Vespa shop, who bought it back from me. He loves this bike and wants it for his personal collection. It's a 1964 small frame with a new ET3 engine in it, so it goes 40mhp+. The guy drove me home on the back of a new scooter, which was fun. Maybe one day I'll get another one with a more solid frame that feels a bit sturdier.

Finally, Some Prime-Time Racism

From LA Times Weekly Columnist Joel Stein.

Battle of the races on 'Survivor' places discussion of stereotypes where it belongs -- in the mainstream.

September 19, 2006

I'VE NEVER BEEN interested in "Survivor," but the new, racist "Survivor" — that, I was psyched about. If "Battle of the Network Stars" made good TV, weekly competitions between poorly fed "tribes" of African Americans, whites, Asians and Latinos were going to be awesome. So, last Thursday night, I got some brie and water crackers, put on a J. Crew sweater vest and settled down on the settee to root for whitey.

None of my white friends wanted to watch with me because — although it was fine for the other races — they felt it was unbecoming for Caucasian Americans to root for their own kind. I found that condescending. Cheering for the whites is no different from rooting for my college football team, for U.S. Olympic teams or for men to finish before women in porn scenes. The latter, unlike the men's Olympic basketball team, never let me down.

But it turns out lots of people got freaked out about this. As soon as CBS announced this season's theme, leaders of the New York City Council demanded that the network abandon the idea, and GM, Coca-Cola, Campbell Soup, Johnson & Johnson and Febreze ended their advertising on the series. You know you've stumbled into a huge pile of it when even Febreze walks away.

No one got upset in past seasons when the show used gender and age to divide people. But we've somehow decided that racial issues can only be discussed in books, college lectures, NPR and other mediums that are so boring people can't get riled up. Songs by Coldplay are probably largely about race.

Unlike 30 years ago, when "All in the Family" and "Chico and the Man" made cutting jokes about race, we've set so many rules about talking about skin color that we rarely do it at all. "Survivor: Cook Islands" isn't trivializing race — it's just not avoiding it like the rest of us. If there really were a group of people stranded on a deserted island, this is exactly how things would go down. Just like in jail.

So I was pumped for some serious racial tension as soon as the contestants pulled up to the island. The giant old ship conjured different images depending on which team was on camera: a slave ship, a makeshift raft from the Dominican Republic, a boat full of Vietnamese or an afternoon sailing cruise to Nantucket. My team was going to rock.

Not only, to my delight, was my team the best looking, but the whiteys seemed to have a really fun attitude, joking and bonding and having a great time. A few minutes into the show, however — long before any contests or voting anyone off — something weird started to happen. I started to turn on my own people.

These white people were a little too preppy, too frat-boy, too happy with themselves. While other teams were fighting over hut building, the white folks were making toasts to each other over little bits of coconut milk and lying down to sleep half-naked and spooning en masse, thrilled with their total super awesomeness. It turns out I kind of hate white people.

The black team wasn't doing it for me either, with its sexism, infighting and talk about representing and feeling each other's vibes. They loved themselves almost as much as white people do.

The Latinos were kind of likable and hardworking if quiet, but those Asians — they were terrific. In fact, better yet, they were like me. They were laid-back and self-effacing. There was a journalist, a lawyer, a management consultant — just like my friends. One of them even went to Stanford four years after I did. And they won the first contest handily, even though their chicken was stolen by the white people. White people who probably didn't even eat the feet or eyeballs.

I don't know if my feelings are because of the fact that this is a particularly nice group of Asians, or if Jews are culturally more akin to Asians than other white people, or because Asians are a completely superior race destined to rule the planet. All I know is that the show is allowing me to make these kinds of racist comments in public.

And I think that's good. Not just because, as CBS argues, getting to know these contestants will help dispel stereotypes. It also will allow us to see which stereotypes are true and discuss which differences make us uncomfortable. Maybe if we admit that race is a factor — just like gender and age — we'll be a little more honest with each other. And maybe we'll also realize that, if we're going to survive, we really need to band together against the yellow people.

movie blog

I've just upgraded my movie blog, so go check it out. Jim can now add reviews and I may add a couple of other reviewers. Please comment to get a discussion going on the films!

Alimony Update

You may remember that Gavin agreed to pay me $800 a month for a longer period of time instead of $920 per month. Well, the first of the month came and went. I left him a message and an email telling him that I'm frustrated, etc and that he knows the penalties for not paying. A few days later I got a check for $400 with a promise for the rest later this month along with an email saying "don't flip, potato chip." He always was charming, but unreliable.

I'm going to tell him that he can either set up an automatic payment with his bank or see me in court. No more renegotiating and not following through. I have better things to do with my time.

SB in Vanity Fair

The News-Press Mess has made it to Vanity Fair. In case you don't read the papers, here's the scoop - The SB News-Press, our daily paper, has been corrupted by it's crazy owner. She is interjecting opinion into news (a major no-no) and been repremanding people when she doesn't like their stories they cover (also a major no-no). It's become a major first ammendment battle and international news. There is a 6 page story starting on page 190 in the October issue of Vanity Fair. It's not posted on the website yet, but hopefully will be at www.vanityfair.com. I have a scanned copy of the article if you want me to email it to you.

2 Fun Blogs

Ever wonder what fleas, tax evaders and fetuses had in common? Check out indexed.

Plastic action figures doing yoga. What's funnier than Barbie and GI Joe cursing over yoga? Visit yogabeans

Yoga Misunderstood

I constantly run into people who think yoga is something that it is not and is for something it is not. So, here's my version of yoga 101.

People say things like "I can't do yoga because I'm not flexible... because I'm not patient... because I'm out of shape... because I have an injury..." All of these statements are filled with misconception that yoga is something you achieve when in actuality it is a practice.

Let's start with an analogy everyone can relate to - homework. Homework and tests serve different purposes. Tests are checking to see if you have already learned the material. Homework is designed to teach you how to do something and to practice different scenarios. Yoga is like homework.

Here's one other analogy before I talk about what yoga is - yoga is like dance. You can dance fast or slow, standing up or sitting down, structured or unstructured, coordinated or not, square or ballet or salsa or tribal or any other way that suits your fancy. What ties all of this together is moving your body to music. Yoga is as varied as dance.

Hatha Yoga is as moving your body with breath. All you have to do is breath in while you move into one pose and breath out while you move into another pose. It's all the stuff that you do in between that makes different styles and teachers different. You can do yoga in a way that is relaxing or builds your flexibility or makes you sweat or gives you better balance or tones your muscles or focuses your mind. So, anyone can do yoga no matter what their physical state. One of the leading yoga teachers today developed his style because he was in a wheelchair and told he couldn't walk.

Just like homework, the benefits of yoga are in the doing, not in the completing. Let's say you are working to become more stronger. You have trouble doing pushups, so working on pushups really builds your strength. One day, doing a pushup is easy. You aren't done building strength because you can do a pushup, so now you have to find the next thing that is going to help you build strength - either more pushups or another excercise. The same holds true for yoga. If you are working to create flexibility and can't touch your toes then a forward fold is great for creating a stretch. Once that pose is easy, you have to find something else to get that same stretch. The yoga is in the stretch, not in the touching of your toes.

So, in a way I'm lucky that I can't touch my toes because no matter what pose I'm doing, I can still get a great stretch.

Make sense? Now that you have no more excuses, go practice.

Baby!

Scott & Kim had their baby! Now I'm "Crazy Auntie Jodi," courtesy of Alex Kaplan. Here are the new baby pics! You can email them at segalsm at hotmail.com.

Now I have proof that I'm right.

I'm now a reviewer for the 2007 Santa Barbara International Film Festival. This verifies me as a bona-fide movie critic! They get 2000 submissions and will screen only 200 at the film fest. It's the reviewers and staff that decide what makes it into the festival. I pick them up at the office and return them within 4 days of checkout. I'm allowed to have friends watch them with me. Based on my involvement, I get rewarded with different levels of passes to the film fest. Let me know if you want to watch them with me!

Alimony/Gavin Update

This has been a busy week! The court told me that I only have option left to get the alimony if Gavin doesn't voluntarily pay. I wasn't about to face him in court with charges that could put him in jail, so I emailed him for lunch. We met on Monday. We were both relieved to see each other. He understands why I shut him out, and I understand why he kept trying to get me to talk with him - we were both hurt and upset. It's been a long time so we are ready to talk again and re-establish a relationship.

Without getting into too many details, he agreed to pay me a slightly lower amount per month for a longer period of time, so it will add up to the same total. The first check is supposed to arrive on September 1st. I hope it works!

Pandora Rocks!

Pandora is like Tivo for music. Enter an artist or song you like and Pandora will play songs with similar qualities. You get to approve or disappove of each song, letting you make the selection more sophisticated.

It's all free and includes music from unsigned artists. You can have multiple radio stations and login from anywhere.

Alimony update

I talked with a lawyer who wants a 3,500 retainer in order to file the forms and appear in court. She estimates the total costs to be 3k-5k. Since that's almost 1/3 of what I'm owed and 10x more than I have in the bank, I think I'm going to pass. I'm trying to see someone at the courts to get some advice. Unfortunately, you have to line up a couple of hours in advance of when they start seeing people in order to get a spot. I tried on Monday, but didn't get in. I'm going to try again next Monday when they are open again. If that doesn't work, then I'll try Legal Aid or a 3rd lawyer. Wierdly, I probably won't be poor enough to qualify for Legal Aid. It's really frustrating that someone willing to do the work herself can't get a straight answer on how to make it happen. Anyone have any ideas?

Photos of Us

Jim's parents came to visit last week. His mom took these photos, so now you can finally see a little bit of our little bitty house and a bit of SB. It's the trade-off for living in paradise.

Good letter in today's paper

Divorce is bane of marriage's sanctity

Bob Barker, Santa Barbara

June 13, 2006

I don't understand how some people have come to the conclusion that gay marriage somehow undermines the sanctity of marriage.

What undermines the sanctity of marriage is divorce. So, if people want to protect the sanctity of marriage, they should be fighting for an amendment to ban divorce.

It would be interesting to see how many people, including our political leaders, would support such an amendment.

Agony of De Teeth

My teeth are conspiring against me. I have been grinding my teeth at night for years, without knowing it. The problem is so severe that my teeth are actually flat now. Anyone who knows about this problem could tell right away by looking at my teeth. Anyone, that is, except my dentist. Hello!!!! Don't you think someone could have told me!?!?

So, my new dentist (who I trust) gives me a $500 night guard to grind on. I crack 2 of them, which she says is impossible. Then I get a 3rd one which only covers some of my teeth leaving space for the most pressure to be left hanging off the back of the guard. This has caused my teeth to realign, along with moving my jaw back. That's when the headaches and shooting pain started in my ears.

So, I went back to the dentist who sent me to an orthodontist specializing in TMJ. He starts off by asking if I had braces as a kid with headgear. Then he said that headgear can pull the jaw back too far, so the jawbone and nerves are too close together, causing the pain.

The solution? He made me night guard #4 (at another $250 that I don't have), with the hopes that I won't crack it. I think he doesn't trust the first 3 were made properly. I hope he's right. Then he suggests "jaw therapy" to my dentist, but doesn't bother to tell me about it. Thank goodness she mentioned it to me. What is jaw therapy you say? Braces!!!! He wants to put me in braces again, for a year and a half, with rubberbands, so my teeth grow down enough to compensate for the grinding.

CRAP! I did everything the orthodontist told me to do and now they want another 5k from me, when I have less than $500 in the bank. Not likely.

I'm going to explore other options like cranio-sacral massage where they hold the muscles of your jaw in a relaxed position so your bones can realign. My massage therapist says grinding is a sign of mineral deficiency. So, it seems there are other, simpler, cheaper things to try first.

The Agony of De Feet

Well, we lost. The election that is. We still can't figure out how it happened. 4 candidates ran for county supervisor from the 2nd of 5 districts in Santa Barbara County. Counties in California have a lot of influence and power over some really important decisions, like land-use, development, housing, and transportation. We came in 3rd place, almost tied for last. We had almost 200 volunteers going door to door in the district, while the other candidates probably had around 20 each. With so much public support and so many people willing to spend their time helping, I can't understand who voted for the other candidates. At least Jim gets to take a very much needed break right now and we get to keep our candidate (Das) on the City Council for another 5 years.

Onward and upward.

a baby, a prom, a wedding, and a funeral

Since my last post, I've seen an entire lifetime of events. My friend Heather & her partner Deb birthed baby Liam at home, Jim & I attended a middle-aged gay prom (it was a blast!), my friend Darien became engaged, and a friend died. Also, I came to terms with my decision on the alimony Gavin owes me. Here's more on the alimony, and then the death.

Last week, Gavin was on the cover of the weekly entertainment newspaper, the SB Independent. It's a great paper that everyone reads and is distributed everywhere. The story was about SB nightlife and only quoted him a couple of times. He is quite well known in SB, so he was their cover photo. The photo isn't available online. He's been very successful, which is great, but his success is one more reason why he shouldn't be let off the hook for the alimony. He DJs about 6 nights a week, works a couple days at a school, owns a DJ school, owns a DJ referral business, and has bought a condo, new truck, and a motorcycle. I would say he has the means to pay the alimony. The courts said that he is legally required to pay me before he pays any other expenses, including his own rent or mortgage. I haven't been aggressive about it for the past year since communication with him is painful and opens the door to more interaction with him. However, I'm living month to month and this was the last straw. I'm going to send him a letter by mail notifying him that I will be garnishing his wages beginning in June. I'll clearly state how it will work and that future communications should be by mail.

The other big thing that has happened is a friend in SB died last week. I barely knew her, but it's still really hard to hear, and I still had to mourn. She was about 25, worked at PIRG, and was severely depressed. She was on suicide watch, but was smart and determined enough to set up a scenario where everyone thought she was with someone else. She moved her car so people would think she was away from home and her roommate was in Boston. She died on Wednesday night. On Monday, her voicemail was full, a friend realized she wasn't where she said she would be, and they called the police. Her close friends and family are saddened, but said she would have died 6 months ago had she not had such close friends and loved ones. The pain was just too much for Mary Braun to bear. I'll post a photo here of her once I get one to help remember her.

$50,000 !!!!

I just got a $50,000 check for Pacific Pride! Woo hoo!!!! This REALLY helps us get back on track and keep our doors open. It may be the biggest check that PPF has ever gotten. It's certainly the biggest one I have, by 5 times!

PS - we also got a 5k challenge grant (we need to raise 5k in matching $ to get the grant) and at 14k foundation grant this week!

Al Franken Hugged Me!

On 3/31/06, Jim & I volunteered for a fundraiser for the Santa Barbara Legal Aid Foundation. LAF does fine work, but neither of us has been involved before. We voluneered because Al Franken was speaking and we could get in for free. When we showed up for the event, we found out that we also got to take shifts at the pre-event meet & greet with the man. We got to meet him and get our photo taken together, where Al hugged me!
For anyone who doesn't know who Al Franken is, think "Deep Thoughts, By Jack Handey." He's also the political satyrist who started the progressive talk radio network "Air America." He did a great job of criticizing Republicans, but let the Democrats totally off the hook, which was very disappointing.

Happy Birthday to Me!

As you all know, today is my 32nd birthday. Many of you are asking, "what did you do for your birthday?" So, here's the exciting answer. On Saturday we had a party at the house. About 30 friends came for BBQ, beer, and wine. They drank less beer than the last party, so we have 1/2 of a pony keg of Sierra Nevada left over. Hurry up and get over here before it gets warm...

My friends brought really nice gifts, which was unexpected. I got a political thriller book, African salad spoons, an array of succulents, an orchid, a funky handmade bowl, and a set of candles/plate/chimes. Scott & Kim mailed me amazing soap from Paris, and my mom sent me a gift card from Ann Taylor Loft (score!). A pretty good haul!

Tonight Jim & I drove down to Smokin' Jack's BBQ in Carpinteria, but it was closed. So, we kept on driving down to Malibu for Jamaican Jerk Salmon. YUM!

Last Friday we volunteered at Al Franken's fundraiser for SB Legal Aid. We got to meet him and get our photo taken. I'll post that as soon as I get it. I just kept repeating to Jim, "Al Franken hugged me!" all night. More on Al when we get the pictures.

Mexico

Jim's in Mexico this weekend on the Baja penninsula. He's surfing a break called Ship Wrecks.

It's in the Cabo De Colonet, 2 miles from the village of Rubean Jalmilla on the 1 Mexican National highway, which is an extension of the 5 in the US.

Oscars

I'm proud to say that 2 donors I cultivated at CALPIRG were major features of tonight's Oscars. Paul Haggis wrote/directed/produced Crash and Sid Ganis is President of the Academy. Congratulations to these progressive philanthropists! It was a pleasure to get to "see" them and Paul's wife, Deborah, again since I no longer get to visit with them at work. The Haggis are great people who deserve this success. I'm sure Sid is great too, but I didn't get to know him well!

Open House

Last night PPF hosted an Open House to welcome our new Executive Director. David is much beloved in the community, plus we need an image make-over, so the party seemed like the perfect event. We had at least 100 people come including major donors, major politicians, and political candidates. We raked in nearly $2,000 in donations.

I couldn't have asked for a better event. People were really impressed with the staff, got to meet Board members, see that others in the community support us, etc.

People had been interested to talk with us, but not necessarily ready yet to donate again. The Open House is key to helping turn the tide.

It's a new day for Pacific Pride Foundation!

Jim got a job!

After 3 months of unemployment, Jim got a job! It's a great job, but it's short term. He's a field organizer for Das Williams's bid for County Supervisor. Das is a perfect candidate - he has great politics, know everything there is to know about the issues, is LOCAL (a must), ambitious, experienced, confident... His political drawback is that he's 31. Some people think he's too young for the seat. However, when they hear about his experience, they put that aside.

There are 4 candidates vying for the seat. The other 3 are Republican Dan Secord who is a former OBGYN and peer of Das's on the SB City Council, Janet Wolf, a Democrat on the Goleta School Board, and Joe Guzzardi is a neighborhood activist. It's already a contentious fight because Dan is very popular and delivered half of the babies in SB and there are 2 Democrats. It's a great opportunity for Jim to meet a lot of players on the scene.

We hope that Das will make it past the primary, both because we want him to win, and also so Jim has a job until November.

February 14th

Is Same Sex Hand Holding Day. Go forth and celebrate.

Carnage in Goleta

Six people are dead and a seventh critically wounded after a former employee of a U.S. Postal Service processing and distribution center in Goleta opened fire with a handgun late Monday before fatally turning the weapon on herself. Fortunately, neither Jim nor I know any of these people. I have to visit this post office tomorrow to drop off a bulk mailing and am not looking forward to it. I'll probably bring donuts or something else to cheer people up.

This is just a year after the disaster known to locals as "La Conchita" when the hill over the small village of La Conchita fell on the homes killing about a dozen people. My friend Katie was killed in a car accident as a result of the aftermath.

Big Wednesday

This is a photo of the giant waves in Santa Barbara in December. See all of those little dots? Those are people. Surprisingly, only one person died trying to surf.

updated 2/25/06: 6 weddings and 6 babies

Jim & I were home for the holidays and were bombarded with babies! My brother and his wife are expecting their first little one in July, while my oldest friend (longest term not OLDEST) Abby is having triplets! Terra & Dave had their baby early and Doug & Faye just popped last week. Here's the revised baby list:

2006

Scott & Kim due in July in England
Abby & Scott due with triplet boys in July in Ohio
Heather & Deb in SB - due with baby Liam in May
Cory in SB - due with a girl in March

2005

Doug & Faye welcome Michael on 12/26/05 in SB.
Terra & Dave welcomed Talia (7 weeks early) on 11/26/05 in SB
Lee Anne in Australia
Jessica in Palo Alto
Rebecca & Michael in Washington
Chris & Kirk had Vienna in Denver
Rachel & Jon had Alexander in Ohio in July
Kris & Chris in Ohio
Mike in Ohio
Teri in SF

We also have 6 weddings/commitment ceremonies/re-commitment ceremonies this year. Sorry folks, but we won't be able to make them ALL. Carol & Marv on April 8, Ed in May, Rena & Robert in Mamouth in July, Erica & Seth in NY in August, Glen in October, Francesca in NY in November. There are 3 engagements too! David & Lacy, Tara & Andy, Amy & Eric are all engaged.

I also got to catch up with old friends. Here's a photo of me, Sharee, Abby, Rachel, and Autumn on 12/30. It turns out that Autumn lives 30 minutes south of me in SB! We are really excited to hang out and she might surf with Jim.